joining voluntary organisations is compulsory [small print in malay]

here’s a funny one..

some malay guy comes to me and basically says that i have to pay a certain amount of membership fee for some malay organisation…i mean, i must say – i was damn shocked..i mean whaddahell? ur tellin me that i gotta  join this organisation? i mean…for WHAT??

leme think..they want £24 (as i recall) for 1 year membership..was i given a list of benefits? nope… i was just given the fact that i’m malay…but WHATDDA EFFF?? i mean – thanks, but no thanks..i don’t need to pay £24 per year to be reminded that i’m malay…i’ll just get my mama to remind me for free(!) <— sarcastic exclamation mark.

so i dedicate 2 fingers in a shape of a V to all malay organisations that want my money..when they can give nothing back to me..i mean, as if i need their help when i got a problem ..as if i don’t know how to live my life independently and need the caress of some penghulu… as if i need their company.. as if i need anything from them… in fact, if anything, they shud pay me to become a member…

well, i don’t have any problem with joining malay organisations… in fact, i’m a dedicated member of SMSA (sheffield malaysian students association) – now that’s an organisation..that’s something useful…and wat makes it useful? well..simply put – the people behind it…there’s fresh minds, eager to learn.. eager to make impact..that’s a society that’s recognised in the university and known by thousands of non-malay/msian students.. [reminds me, i haven’t paid my membership fee this year] ….[ok, a few undergrads in the past have mentioned to me they’re unhappy with SMSA due to certain reasons – which is obvious but i won’t mention here – but come on, compare smsa to any other [non-malay/msian] student society in that university – smsa rocks – n a society can’t always plez everyone, that’s just the way it is.]

so why shud i pay for a different organisation a lot more money for nothing? in my opinion [and this is where i will offend people], I ABSOLUTELY HATE being around the company of most msian PhD students here in the UK…. these ppl are supposed to be the society molders of msia as most of them are lecturers @ university in msia… but here’s something that i’ll let you all know (my opinion)..

ever wondered why:

1. msian phd student’s development of the english language is SH** compared to their children’s english? [even though they both live in the UK for the same amount of time]
2. msian phd’s level of critical thinking is inferior to the level of an british 18yr old college student?
3. msian phd’s level of strategic thinking is similar to the strategic thinking of a primary school student in the UK.

let me elaborate

criticism 1 – slow learning curve

i’ve been to many PHD student’s houses…where i’ve seen the stark difference between the parents and their children.. the phd students obviously speak malay to me..and i speak malay back to them..but if u notice the kids, they are more likley to speak english.. and when u listen to the accents of the children speaking english – in a very short amount of time (maybe 5-6 months or so), they’re able to communicate confidently in their 2nd language in an accent which is almost authentically english..that’s amazing.. and u can’t use the fact that they;re kids so they pick up more…cos then i’ll slap u back with my personal example… i was in msia aged 20-21 (for 10 months) and it took me about 6-7 months before i could improve my malay to a level where nobody knew i’m from the uk..(and i learned my malay from the first 4 or 5 years of my life, then the rest from a book+individual study during my time in university) i.e. that means master the accent as well as enough grammatical knowledge + vocabulary…my key to success? the same as the phd student’s kids – we mix with people outside of our normal circle of contacts…so these kids are obviously in english speaking schools where everything’s in english.. i personally took myself out of my family and met ppl…e.g. i attended usrah as many times as possible (and although my teacher could speak 3 or 4 languages inc english), it was done in malay [from indonesian books] due to the other members of the usrah..

so what excuse has the phd student got to not improve their level of communication? well…its sheer laziness and the lack of understanding the importance of communication to be put frank.

criticism 2 – unmatured thinking methods

being with melayu uk, i get the opportunity to meet many young men + women (aged around 16-19) who are children of the PHD students.. or children of those who reside in the uk permanently.. and i must say, everytime i meet one of them, i’m guaranteed to be impressed by them.

recently in my travels to msia, a friend of mine introduced me to a young 19yr old lady, someone who did her a-levels in the UK when her parents were here…in fact, her family knew my family [but i just never met this young woman]… anyway, initially after conversing in malay, we switched to english ..and not only was her english one of the best i’ve heard coming from a malay (who’s only spent 3-4 years in the UK), but her thinking was impressive. i was taken back… we went into discussions of societal analysis and stuff…confident, clear, concise – her train of thought was clearly different to the malay norm (of nothing)..

i speak to other teenage malays born + raised in the UK – or lived here for a long time.. and its the same.. u can’t just tell them something and they’ll swallow the information like some baby.. nope – they’ll analyse it, critisize it, and if they disagree they’ll tell u they disagree – and they’ll put a strong arguement for their case..

compare that to a PHD student from msia – when u question them on something, they’ll startle – they’ll think “what kind of question is this?” – its too much for them to handle …they can’t take criticism..especially from a train of thought which is outside of the norm (i.e. the rest of the 6 billion ppl in the world are different in thinking) – so that goes to show their incapability and immaturity in mental development…what a shame that they have to raise the next generation of university students in msia…. such a shame to see them be one of the causes of a zombie-mentality rakyat.

Criticism 3 – incapability to strategise

take all the organisations that phd students get involved with..they are just organisations with standard kampung mentality..they have their penghulu who sits in the middle pretending his position is so important that if he wasn’t there the society would collapse..

[btw i have nothing against kampung ppl…and i certainly dont look down on them, see i think many kampung ppl hold on to crucial islamic moral values that those in the city let go of easily,,which makes the city so cold..and u cant judge  a person based on his/her welfare cos Allah provides + sets the rizq… but when an educated city person uses his intellect to expand in his career, but in his social work chooses to use a similar thinking thread to those who r uneducated – that just goes to show how he doesnt appreciate/value the education that he has..or that he wasnt taught well enough]

well, lets see what they do first. let’s list some of the things PHD organisations do

1. pick people up from airport, find them a house to stay in
2. organise buka puasa sessions and hari raya celebrations + terawih
3. manage a few yahoogroups
4. erm… erm… ermm….

ok, that’s all i can think of cos to be honest, i don’t see much from them.

ok, so when a new penghulu is appted, he takes over the reigns…there’s no mission statement for the organisation..just he controls wat structure someone set up decades ago.. so its purely organisational management with very little thinking…if someone comes to uk, penghulu will get somoene to pick them up from airport… the hardest thing is “who shall go to the airport? hmm..not such-n-such cos he’s just had a baby…not such-n-such cos he’s got his viva..ooo howabout such-n-such, let me call him” …this is the kind of stuff that kids in highschool do when they’re thinking when to play football and with whom after school.

so strategic management – i.e. the type of mgmt which requires the stategiser to clearly understand his ppl, understand the situation and where he wants to take the ppl to i.e. the next level..and how to get there..that vision of the future is absent in these phd’s minds…its like they’ve been zombified to not think about these things..

———–

ok..enough of the elaborations ..u see, i wouldn’t normally critisize a group of ppl like this so harshly – but wat makes me vexed is that most of them are so damn stuck up – they think that just cos they are the abang + kakak of the undergrads, that they know better and these budak2 undergrad are just learning as they’re all new in life..

and wat i also hate is when the undergrads look up to these ‘abang+kakak’ so much – for wat reasons? that they’re 10-15 years older? what F***ked-up reason is that.. come on undergrads – ur the future…u’ve not been poisoned so much by these F***ked up PHD students – u’ve still got eagerness to learn.. u’ve still got a forward-thinking mentality that’s required for the future of msia + the world. don’t feel u’r a lower level than these phd students… trust me, the best employers in the world would rather be interested in u as opposed to some old-fashioned backward phd student.. because they know its hard to change the minds (to improve) of older ppl..

it really saddens me when i sense an undergrad feels inferior just because a few phd students are present..i mean, i think its time undergrads began to teach the PHD students something.. (cos clearly, we don’t learn anything from them).

well…i got news for those phd students – if they even botherded to wake up and get out of their Fu***ed up malay-phd-supremacy organisation, they’d realise that they’re an embarrasment to society.. they live here for 4-5 years and go back to their fu**ed up jobs in msia, thinking they’ve accomplished the best of the best…

well, they may have a PHD – something I’ll probably never ever even bother to achieve – but what’s the use of a PHD when you’re level of thinking is less than that of a child? [a recent govt official i met said that he was suprised at the low level of questioning that the phd students asked him during his visit to the uk]

wat’s the use of having a phd and becoming a lecturer when u only recite the same verses of engineering year in and year out to your students who get younger by 1 year every year…yet u get older?

wats the point of being in such a place of influence and responsibility when you clearly don’t know how to influence a person (never mind a group of ppl) and ur skills of responsibility is similar to that of an unborn child?

F*** THEM ALL! I’D NEVER JOIN THEIR ORGANISATIONS.

I’ve got more pride than that.

Regards
Suhaib

PS. I’ve met a few cool PHD students though – recently just met one more – he’s doing something like new product design..so  as u can imagine, he’s always on the edge of things and always got a clear vision..THAT’s the kind of guy i look up to…if he had an organisation, i wouldn’t hesitate to join and pay the £24/ year.

PPS. for anyone wanting to join those organisations, i’ve got nothing against you… its just the ppl who are arrogant and stuck up – they’re the ones i got a problem with.

PPPS. these organisations are acutally good… i mean, it helps other ppl …but what i’m against is the arrogance that comes from them..thinking they’re so good… and also the fact that they choose to keep to a backward kampung mentality by not even thinking of how to drive their members forward to become better developed ppl..

Raising Kids in the West

One thing that really irritates me is when some people assume its so damn easy to raise kids up as good Muslims in the UK. And you know what they say to me to prove this phenomena? They say, ‘Your father’s done a good job with his 9 kids’.

 

Are you for real? Do you really think that just cos you consider me and my siblings to turn out ‘OK’ that its easy to raise kids in the West?

 

Have they got no idea as to how much abuse we (the children) had to go through in order to get ourselves to this ‘level’ which you assume to be good.

 

Let’s face it – a kid sleeps 8 hours per day… goes to school 8 hours per day… spends time in his room, watches TV, does homework, goes out with friends probably totaling the rest of the 24hrs left in the day…

 

So the parent doesn’t really teach the child. The parent sees the child when he’s watching TV or at the dinner table (although its TV dinners for most asian families). So society teaches the child… the child learns more at school than from their parents. Most of the times, the kid doesn’t even go in-line with the parent’s philosophy.

 

I got to all sorts of things during my school and college days – things which neither the Islamic or Malay traditions would approve of. In fact, many of the things I did, people would outcast me because of it – I’m not saying I’m proud of the wrong things that I’ve done – but I’m just saying that’s what a typical British Asian kid does.

 

Of course the parent doesn’t know these things happen.

 

I’m sick and tired of the parents who say to me …’yeah, but I want my child to be close to me and share everything with me’

 

GET REAL!! What child living in the 21^st century would want to even be seen with his/her parents. That’s equivalent embarrassment to ‘grassing’ someone up in school!

 

So the parents would say something like “yeah but it shouldn’t be like that” – erm…hello!!!! Did you not hear what I’m trying to say?

 

Parents are not the same as friends. Parents are parents. They are not friends. Yes, I agree that there are some parents who are almost like friends to their children. But judging by the number of Malay cases I’ve witnessed – this is a very rare occurrence in the Malay case.

 

Don’t think you can relate to your children. In most cases you can’t. That’s just a fact of life. Insha’allah, when I have kids (if Allah permits) – I’ll understand more about the difficulties of parenthood – but this article isn’t about parenthood – I’m just being the voice of the children.

 

MORAL: Those parents thinking its easy to raise children in the West – Stop living in a dream world. Especially if you yourself was not born and raised in the West – don’t claim to know what its like. It’s an insult to our intelligence.

 

So to all those Melayu UK members thinking its easy to raise their children here in the UK – please do your children a favour – don’t ever assume its easy. I’d hate to see a child going through what I had to go through.